Charles' and Wally's Autism Adventures

BIG NEWS!!!  We have moved to Cortland, New York!  Our new house has a small back yard, but it's our back yard.  So one of the first things I started looking for was a sturdy...like industrial strength...outdoor trampoline.  I found one that had 5 star reviews with pictures of large trees falling on it and the trampoline remaining undamaged.  So I got it and it only took a few hours to put together.  It was worth the cost right away.  Jumping, laughing, jumping, jumping, laughing.  Sometimes Wally gets hot and throws his shirt over the sides... We've now spent many hours having great fun on our trampoline.  There are few things more joyful than jumping hand in hand with both Wally and Leo smiling and laughing.  With the days getting shorter, I decided we needed lights so that evening jumping could be possible.  It's a party just for Wally. :) Wally and Leo both love it so much that we even got them special trampoline slippers so th...

 Wallyboy!     I've been rewatching the Marvel movies in timeline order while I wait for my sons to fall asleep.  They will not stay in their beds unless I am still in the room, and sometimes it takes them a long time to fall asleep.  As I've been reflecting on these superhero stories, I'm realizing that their super abilities empowered them to be able to save the galaxy...AND often led to great challenges in their lives.  Many people misunderstood these superheroes.  This comparison only goes so far but it is helping me believe that my son Wally who has ASD can do great things, even if there are a lot of difficulties along the way and even if most of the rest of the world does not understand him...even if I don't understand him.       Since he was very young I have often called him, "Wallyboy!"  Little did I know that he has a brain that can do amazing things!  You can see in this picture how he has amazing climbing a...

Something amazing happened today: I went sledding with my sons.  Not at the same time, but I went with Leo this morning and Wally this afternoon.  There were many other parents and kids out sledding today.  But most days when the snow is perfect for sledding, and I see all those neurotypical kids and parents out there, I just want to look away.  I try not to think about what I am missing because both of my sons have Autism.  But today we figured out how to make it work and for the most part it worked very well!  Today I had lots of fun in the snow with my sons.  Part of me just wants to savor this and say no more. Selah. There were lots of other kids out there, which you can see at the top of the hill.  This is Wally observing them.  This picture captures a lot of how it feels being an Autism dad.  The neurotypical kids are playing... over there...and we are over here, and I have no idea what Wally will do or say.  He still has no u...

It has been a while...  Some major life updates are in order.  Wally is 7.  Doing very well.  Leo is 4.5 and has started going to preschool because he was diagnosed ASD on December 11th.  Our 3rd son is due at the end of March 2021.  I was the 3rd son in my family so I feel a weird and cool connection to this child already. Kim and I will both finish our Masters Degrees from Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary in May 2021.  What's next?  Adventure!  I was accepted into the PhD Divinity at University of St Andrews on December 8th, 2020 or as they say it in Scotland, 08 December.  This is a dream come true. So we will be adding to our...wonderfully complex life an infant and an international move...changing almost every detail of our physical existence with not one but TWO Autistic children...during a pandemic.   Why?  Because God has clearly and repeatedly called us to this.  And because together we can do impossi...

smile :) A smiling breakfast is not a big deal, but the longer I'm here at seminary and the longer I'm on this adventure into the world of autism (ASD) and being Wally's dad, the more I'm convinced of the upside-down nature of the universe.  One of these upside down things is that little things often matter much more than the big things.  Reflecting on my life with Wally has helped me see this.  A few of my recent classes have confirmed it.  Here are a few of these little things that make a big difference in my life. 1) SLEEP.  My sleep has not been what I consider "normal" for over 6 years.  Being tired has become my normal so most of the times when people ask me how I'm doing and mean it, I say, "I'm tired, but I'm always tired...I'm also..."      Part of having abnormal sleep patterns for so long is that sometimes you just wake up.  Energy is a mysterious thing when sleep deprivation is normal.  And when it comes,...

It's been a while. Wally has been growing and growing as children do.  His language skills are still far behind his neurotypical peers, but exciting new things happen every week. This week we had a poosplosion.  Most parents will not need an explanation of this term, but for those who have not experienced a pooslosion I'll elaborate.  Diapers have a certain capacity.  Poo is a certain size and exits with a certain velocity and direction.  At times poop exits at an angle or capacity that exceeds the diaper.  This results in poop being in the clothes, up the back, down a leg...anywhere.  The poop escapes. So my wife yelled, "Charles!", in that special tone of voice reserved for poosplosions and broken bones. I entered the bedroom and see my wife holding Wally's hands up, one with poop on half of it, and one still clean.  Poop was smeared across most of one of his thighs. I grabbed the wipes and got busy cleaning Wally while Kim kept...